There are some very important things you’ve forgotten while preparing your children to go back to school!
Somebody, please get me a pair of oversized glasses and a hoodie because kids are not going to like what I have to say. Parents, you may not like it either. But it needs to be said according to my super secret and completely anonymous sources.
Fidget Spinners. Ok, before I go any further here, let me just share that according to Scott Kollins, a clinical psychologist, and professor at Duke University, there is no evidence to support the claim that fidget spinners help kids focus- despite marketers claims.
Don’t believe Scott? Umm-kay, how about Dr. Mark Rapport, MD, and Director of the Children’s Learning Clinic at the University of Central Florida’s Department of Psychology who said, “Using a spinner like a gadget is more likely to serve as a distraction than a benefit for individuals with ADHD.” Not to mention the many teachers who agree that these ninja like toys are just that-toys. Let’s tell our kids to keep their collection at home.
Glitter and Superhero Pencils. Any pencil other than a primary #2 needs to stay out of the schoolhouse. Yes, I understand your kid doesn’t want the basic brand, but see, the problem with all the others is that they tear up the class’s pencil sharpener in two seconds flat. In case you don’t remember, the sharpener is a hot spot in all elementary classrooms. If it goes down, the entire class goes with it. Moms, please don’t contribute to this. Just say no. Your kid can show his swagger in another way. Perhaps a Trapper Keeper?
Homework. Parents, it’s perfectly acceptable if you do not know how to do your child’s homework. (I cannot believe I just wrote that sentence, but every teacher asked me to add it so I had to put it in!) Please know that your kids have been properly instructed multiple times on how to complete the assignment. The work is not yours to do and if you do in fact “pitch in” the teacher will know.
Speaking of knowing…
Facebook. Teachers are on social media too! I have seen so many unnecessary “read more” rants on Facebook than I care to comment on. You know, the post is so long that you have to click “read more” to see all of it? I understand people get angry, especially when it comes to their kids, but come on y’all! Ninety-nine percent of these posts get deleted because after the parent (mostly moms) calms down and they realize they could’ve handled it with the teacher. Plus, they’re not doing their kid any favors by blasting the teacher on social media.
Side note. Can you imagine working all day-all year-with someone’s child-only to read their parent rip you to shreds on your newsfeed? Let me ask you something. How would that motivate you to make a difference in a child’s life? It would inspire me to start looking for another job.
Parents, teachers don’t get paid the money that they deserve. Can we all agree to at least give them a little more respect?
About that R-E-S-P-E-C-T…
Teacher to Parent Notes. Look at em. Read them. Live them. Just checking to see if you were paying attention! No one expects you to live out the note about special t-shirt day unless you want to, but seriously, if a teacher spends the time to write out a note you need to read it!
Ok, (cracks knuckles and pops neck) I’m skipping the soap box and jumping straight onto the stage for these nuggets, so I hope you are concentrating.
DON’T MAKE ME HAVE TO USE ALL CAPS!!!
Your kids are NOT ready to go back to school until you’ve talked to them about how they are going to act when they get there.
My kids know that at school their teacher is like their mom. They are to follow the rules no matter how ridiculous they may seem. If my nine-year old’s teacher asks her to hop on one leg or fall to the floor and fry like bacon she better sizzle. And if they get in trouble at school, they will be in even more trouble at home.
My kids know that they are to show respect for all teachers, aides, librarians, secretaries, janitors, cafeteria employees-basically any adult that graces the entrance of the school building.
Tell your kids to follow the Golden Rule before they go back to school!
Before your kids go back to school remind them to say things like:
And in some cases:
Everyone has heard if you don’t have something nice to say don’t say anything at all. Unfortunately, many kids do not abide by this policy, and that is where bullying plays in. This is not a post about bullying, but as a special needs parent, I do feel like I should point out that special needs kids are working harder than the others. They are also prime targets for bullies.
Please, please speak to your children about bullying before school begins. And after it starts. And again. And again. Please. It hurts my heart to think about my son becoming a target. You can learn more about bullying here.
Alrighty then! I think that just about covers everything you may have forgotten for back to school. In case you have a mom brain like me here’s what we’ve decided to do.
Leave the fidget spinners at home.
Buy #2 pencils
Make our kids do their homework
No more rants on Facebook
Read the teacher’s notes
Tell our children how we expect them to behave
That’s all! Now I’m going to hide from all the fidget spinning Unicorn pencil aficionados-so basically I’m on the run from all kids.
I think a safe place to hide will be the laundry room.