When you’re an autism mom, finding another parent who “gets it” is rare. Raising a child with autism comes with its own set of rules, and to someone outside our squad, they may seem a bit unusual.
I get it – my son has autism and sensory processing disorder.
Sometimes all the time – my life looks a little different than the “typical mom.” So, I put together this list of Jeff Foxworthy – like “signs” for those times you may feel like you’re the only one who lives this way:)
You May Be An Autism Mom If…
Your idea of self – care is drying your hair.
You can read a room better than an FBI Agent.
You’ve got padlocks, chain locks, and chimes on every door in your home, but your kid still manages to get out every time you go to the bathroom.
You’ve got an entrance & exit strategy for McDonald’s.
You’ve explained “The Autism” to your Aunt Linda 100 times, and she still doesn’t get it.
You took 1,000 pictures of your kid, and every single one is blurry.
You interrupt your sentences with “Wait, Where’s my kid?”
You never pee in
public anywhere anymore. There’s no time.
You may be an autism mom if – You’ve “got a guy” at Blue Cross Blue Shield.
You’ve got 1.5 million toys, and your child prefers an extension cord & a coat hanger.
You could wallpaper your home & your mother’s with all of the IEP paperwork you get.
You understand there is no such thing as buying too many Clorox wipes or too much cereal.
You’ve ever hummed the Lil Jon rap classic Get Low as you are cleaning the poop off your, well, windows and walls.
You have a go-to list of – autism squad style super parents to turn to when you need advice (
You’ve ever pulled a muscle carrying paperwork into an IEP Meeting.
You’ve ever let your child watch YouTube for three hours straight.
You’ve said “Get back here” 65 times today.
You’ve ever legit panicked over a missing iPad.
You’ve ever gotten dizzy from rolling your eyes when other parents talk about how hard homework is.
All of the Favorites in your browser are Acronyms: IEP, SPED, IDEA, UTI
You’ve said “Don’t Poop in the Bathtub”
three ten times today.
You’ve ever let your kid run around the house naked.
You understand the difference between vegan & gluten/casein free diets.
You’ve said “Don’t put your wiener there” ten times today.
You’ve ever (almost) cussed someone out on the cereal aisle at Walmart because of how they looked at your child, but realized that’s just their face.
You’ve held it together all day long only to lost your mind when Wendy’s tells you they are cleaning their Frosty machine
You get heart palpitations when you see the school’s number on caller id.
You just wish more people understood.
Are you an “autism mom”?
What did I miss?
Let me know in the comments section below!